Power of Language
I attended an anti-bias workshop today, which restarted my thinking about language, the power of words, and when and from where we acquire their meanings. As someone who has fiercely protected and molded my kids' lives so far, I've been very intentional about addressing the issues of fairness, inequity, respect, acceptance, and difference. As a result, I get even more embarassed when my kids make a statement that I believe reflects poorly on me, or at least on the liberal, social justice side of me.
For instance, there was a Memorial Day period in which Raina was entranced by all the flags she saw. Suddenly, flags were her new favorite item to point out to me. We spent an afternoon walking down the Delmar Loop with my little daughter loudly demanding "I want see more FAGS, Mommy, more fags!" She, of course, could not pronounce the L's. I understood exactly what Raina was communicating but no one else did, so I received a fair amount of shocked and aghast looks that afternoon. I was nothing short of mortified.
Fast forward to Lola. Her first real word was "cracker" which for her meant a Triscuit or Wheat Thin, i.e., her favorite snack. However, no one at the Zoo had that background knowledge when Lola began shouting racially charged language at them. I never stopped my children from saying their words -- how do you explain to a two-years-old the nuanced history of race and/or sexual orientation in the States? -- but I was grateful when they gained more words so that their sentences had clear context for any bystander.
Two weeks ago, a cicada flew into my car and startled the crap out of me when I was driving. After I flung it out of the window, I said "Ugh! Those things are UGLY!" to which Raina replied, "What's ugly, Mom?" Raina, age 6, learned the word "ugly" that day and I don't know if I should be ashamed or thrilled that she learned it from me.
She and Lola know the power of words -- they see how overjoyed Eric and I are when they say "I love you so much!" -- and I sincerely worry about when they will be exposed to words that have the sole purpose of hurting someone else.
For instance, there was a Memorial Day period in which Raina was entranced by all the flags she saw. Suddenly, flags were her new favorite item to point out to me. We spent an afternoon walking down the Delmar Loop with my little daughter loudly demanding "I want see more FAGS, Mommy, more fags!" She, of course, could not pronounce the L's. I understood exactly what Raina was communicating but no one else did, so I received a fair amount of shocked and aghast looks that afternoon. I was nothing short of mortified.
Fast forward to Lola. Her first real word was "cracker" which for her meant a Triscuit or Wheat Thin, i.e., her favorite snack. However, no one at the Zoo had that background knowledge when Lola began shouting racially charged language at them. I never stopped my children from saying their words -- how do you explain to a two-years-old the nuanced history of race and/or sexual orientation in the States? -- but I was grateful when they gained more words so that their sentences had clear context for any bystander.
Two weeks ago, a cicada flew into my car and startled the crap out of me when I was driving. After I flung it out of the window, I said "Ugh! Those things are UGLY!" to which Raina replied, "What's ugly, Mom?" Raina, age 6, learned the word "ugly" that day and I don't know if I should be ashamed or thrilled that she learned it from me.
She and Lola know the power of words -- they see how overjoyed Eric and I are when they say "I love you so much!" -- and I sincerely worry about when they will be exposed to words that have the sole purpose of hurting someone else.
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