Joyous Appreciation of the Season

Tis the season for frantic holiday shopping, wrapping presents, lamenting lack of cash and/or extraordinary expenditures of cash, and hoping that everyone will be happy with the results.  Ah, Christmas. 

We Whomptons attended a NYE party last night and the guests were discussing how stressful this time period is each year.  One woman wished to have a vacation after Christmas to have calm days off to spend with family.  Another wished for a “no gifts” policy – she was certain that she would enjoy the holiday season more if she didn’t have this obligation of buying multiple items for every extended family member.  Eric and I looked at each other and said, “That’s what we do and it’s great!” 

Okay, so technically that’s not true.  Eric and I purchase one item for each daughter as a New Year’s gift.  This year, Lola received a $15 Elsa dress and Raina received a tabletop game for the entire family to play.  The girls are incredibly appreciative of their gifts and never complain (to us, anyway) that other friends receive many more gifts over winter break. 

When other adults hear that we don’t give gifts, they shy away a bit and say, “But Christmas is all about the kids!”  They are flummoxed that children can be just as happy with fewer items.  Our daughters won the genetic lottery by being born into our household.  We can financially provide them with everything they need – food, shelter, clothing, education, time, love – and with little visible cost.  What more could they want? 

Kids are happy with one gift and one gift only, provided they receive a gift that shows we know them well.  When the kids were younger, any item was instantly treasured and it was hard to go wrong.  Raina is now more discriminating and more aware and I have a little bit of terror that in the next few years we’ll get her the wrong thing and she’ll teenage meltdown, claiming that we don’t know her at all.  (To be clear, I’m worried that her criticism will be spot on and that we won’t know the teenage Raina as well.  That’s certain to be in our future, I expect, although I hope to avoid it.)  But she has pretty simple desires now and she wants the same things that all people want.  She wants to know that she’s loved.  She knows that folks show love by committing time to each other; when her grandparents asked Raina to make a wish list, she responded, “I want to see them more.” 

So, at core, we practice the philosophy of fewer material gifts.  And it does make for an exceptionally calm and joyous winter season.

Raina and Lola performed in their Winter Concert two weeks ago and then we joined friends to explore CandyCane Lane, multiple streets decked out in astounding holiday light displays.  We sang and gawked and enjoyed each other’s company.  That weekend we reconnected with two sets of family friends with whom we had not visited in months, volunteered as a family, and celebrated Good Cheer at the Ethical Society.  The next week saw six more kid playdates, an awesome trip to the STL Zoo, volunteering at the FoodBank with good friends, the arrival of Eric’s family, crazy cousin fun, a Science Center trip, and then the New Year’s Eve party with another set of friends.  Also during this time we furiously cleaned house, cooked a lot, played outdoors, went hiking, read lots of books, played board games, smiled a lot, said “I love you” countless times, and overwhelmingly enjoyed ourselves. 

To begin 2015, we Whomptons spent four fun hours playing the first installment of Raina’s Mice and Mystics game, ate traditional black eyed peas and other tasty treats, went for a family walk, Raina and Eric played the Lord of the Rings card game, and then Raina generously played waltzes on the piano so that Lola could imagine herself as Elsa at a ball.  Really, an incredible family day all around.

Our winter break has been calm and joyous, filled with family and friends, love and laughter.  I hope that 2015 continues with this same positive energy!